"Be civil to all; sociable to many; familiar with few; friend to one; enemy to none."
~Benjamin Franklin
Be civil to all...Now there's a concept. But what is "being civil"? Many people seem to use the phrase "common courtesy" interchangeably with "being civil". In reality, I believe that these are two very different ideas. Common Courtesy. This consists of a set of rules or guidelines on what to do in just basic respect between human beings. Acknowledging when someone walks into the room, Holding a door open for someone right behind you, keeping your voices down and talking to a minimum during a movie. These are all filed under "common courtesy". But being civil? I think that's another topic.
Maybe it's the slow perversion of our language over the sands of time, or perhaps it's just the rising amount of hatred running through our collective veins. Whatever the reason, "being civil" is hardly a good thing to be. According to the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary, "civil often suggests little more than the avoidance of overt rudeness." Upon reading this, I'm sure many of you are starting to see where I'm going with this. "overt rudeness"...which means to not be openly rude. So, more then likely there are bad feelings toward the person in which one is "being civil" to. If there is a problem with them, should you not have the common courtesy...no should they not have a right to know what the problem is? It could just be a misunderstanding, or a drop in the lines of communication. Instead, society has created this "being civil" to allow people a way to avoid confrontation like this.
People may not want the confrontation for various reasons. Perhaps, it's the friend of your significant other. Maybe it's your boss. For whatever reason, living a lie is easier then confrontation. That's what "being civil" really is, lying. While some people may be civil to someone powerful, in hopes of being thrown a bone, Others may just stand civil as to not create turmoil among a group of friends. While the latter motive may seem perfectly reasonable to most, if a problem is covered up, its still a problem. Therefore, it would be a smart idea to confront the issue head on and resolve it. Or at least come to an understanding. I'm sorry Ben, but in this day, your civil is anything but "civil".
S.T.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Lets Call This Dance the Truth Twist
Oh man, Today's already an interesting day.
In fact, so interesting that today deserves two quotes. Be excited.
American Poet, Essayist, and Philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, "What you do speaks so loud I cannot hear what you're saying." At first glance, this quote didn't make sense to me. Then I looked closer, and it made all the sense in the world. Growing up, everyone used to say "actions speak louder than words." This is what R.W.E. was trying to say. Not just that the actions were speaking louder, but that they were SO contradictory to the words, that those words could not be heard at all.
Guys experience this all the time. They'll be with a girl and she'll be particularly quiet or what not so the question always comes up of "Whats wrong?" A simple question usually responded to with a simple answer, "I don't know." or "Oh, nothing." Nothing. Right. Based on your current actions, anything BUT nothing is the right answer. An age old tango of words ensues as the answering party dodges and weaves while the questioning party attempts to make some sort of sense out of this situation. In the end, "Nothing" usually means "everything" and "I don't know?" well...That means they know exactly what it is, but for some reason they don't wish to say. This leads me to a rather obscure source, George Jackson.
"Patience has it's virtue. Take it too far, and it's cowardice."
Patience. Have Patience. Love is Patient. This...Patience...it has its place. Any relationship, friendship requires patience. But at a point for a normal person, patience runs dry because of lie after lie. That person will get tired and decide it's time to move on with life. No matter what the sorrow of a friend removed, or the longing for a lover lost, These people cut their losses and move on. Look at Frank though, Frank has a problem, hes being strung along. "Oh she'll come around," he says. "It's only a matter of time," he reiterates. Guess what Frank, she won't. There is not a thing you can do about it. Some people may see this as patience for something worth waiting for. At this point, its cowardice. It is only you Frank, you being afraid to move on. Afraid you won't find another girl like her. I'm here to bring you light, you will. There are plenty out there that you will meet. Just remember...
There Is Always Another Day
S.T.
In fact, so interesting that today deserves two quotes. Be excited.
American Poet, Essayist, and Philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, "What you do speaks so loud I cannot hear what you're saying." At first glance, this quote didn't make sense to me. Then I looked closer, and it made all the sense in the world. Growing up, everyone used to say "actions speak louder than words." This is what R.W.E. was trying to say. Not just that the actions were speaking louder, but that they were SO contradictory to the words, that those words could not be heard at all.
Guys experience this all the time. They'll be with a girl and she'll be particularly quiet or what not so the question always comes up of "Whats wrong?" A simple question usually responded to with a simple answer, "I don't know." or "Oh, nothing." Nothing. Right. Based on your current actions, anything BUT nothing is the right answer. An age old tango of words ensues as the answering party dodges and weaves while the questioning party attempts to make some sort of sense out of this situation. In the end, "Nothing" usually means "everything" and "I don't know?" well...That means they know exactly what it is, but for some reason they don't wish to say. This leads me to a rather obscure source, George Jackson.
"Patience has it's virtue. Take it too far, and it's cowardice."
Patience. Have Patience. Love is Patient. This...Patience...it has its place. Any relationship, friendship requires patience. But at a point for a normal person, patience runs dry because of lie after lie. That person will get tired and decide it's time to move on with life. No matter what the sorrow of a friend removed, or the longing for a lover lost, These people cut their losses and move on. Look at Frank though, Frank has a problem, hes being strung along. "Oh she'll come around," he says. "It's only a matter of time," he reiterates. Guess what Frank, she won't. There is not a thing you can do about it. Some people may see this as patience for something worth waiting for. At this point, its cowardice. It is only you Frank, you being afraid to move on. Afraid you won't find another girl like her. I'm here to bring you light, you will. There are plenty out there that you will meet. Just remember...
There Is Always Another Day
S.T.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Welcome One And All To The Show
Well, This is it, my new space. It's kinda cozy isn't it?
Anyways, I probably should answer some questions first.
Who Am I?
I'm just a kid. Noone special tho. male, early 20's, college, girls, work. You know, the usual suspects.
What Is This?
This...This is my life. Not in the normal "look at me, look at me!" sense. I hope it will be more in the "Here's where I went wrong" sense. Or maybe the always classic "Did you even think about this?" sense. Either way, I hope its an interesting read.
Okay, now onto the fun part.
Sir Francis Bacon once said, "If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts he shall end in certainties." Now, let me explain what I take from that. A few weekends ago, I had the ever pleasant experience of going out with a girl. I guess at this point you should know two things. One, I love quotes. Two, I also love sarcasm. Take that last statement for example. Yes, I had a very nice time, and thought she did too. But upon later words, I found out she did not. "It felt forced" she said. "I had a lot of fun, but it was just weird at times."
"I had a lot of fun, but it was just weird at times." Oh great, weird? WEIRD? Come on, what could she possibly mean by "weird"? Then it occurred to me...The way we were going, I came into the date expecting nothing short of a relationship. This gentlemen, is where I should make my point. never, EVER, go into a date expecting an outcome. If you do, you will surely shoot yourself in the foot. Que the Quote please! I started with certainties and now I'm sitting here listening to sappy music (Believe by Staind, don't get me wrong, great song, love the guitar work, but sappy) and wondering what will become of this situation. So I guess you could say, I started with certainty of the outcome, and now I'm typing and doubting everything about the situation. When, I guess according to Francis Bacon, if i would have just walked in with doubts, or an open mind, then i would have walked out with certainity, either "girlfriend" or "this wont work".
Touche Sir Bacon, Touche.
S.T.
Anyways, I probably should answer some questions first.
Who Am I?
I'm just a kid. Noone special tho. male, early 20's, college, girls, work. You know, the usual suspects.
What Is This?
This...This is my life. Not in the normal "look at me, look at me!" sense. I hope it will be more in the "Here's where I went wrong" sense. Or maybe the always classic "Did you even think about this?" sense. Either way, I hope its an interesting read.
Okay, now onto the fun part.
Sir Francis Bacon once said, "If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts he shall end in certainties." Now, let me explain what I take from that. A few weekends ago, I had the ever pleasant experience of going out with a girl. I guess at this point you should know two things. One, I love quotes. Two, I also love sarcasm. Take that last statement for example. Yes, I had a very nice time, and thought she did too. But upon later words, I found out she did not. "It felt forced" she said. "I had a lot of fun, but it was just weird at times."
"I had a lot of fun, but it was just weird at times." Oh great, weird? WEIRD? Come on, what could she possibly mean by "weird"? Then it occurred to me...The way we were going, I came into the date expecting nothing short of a relationship. This gentlemen, is where I should make my point. never, EVER, go into a date expecting an outcome. If you do, you will surely shoot yourself in the foot. Que the Quote please! I started with certainties and now I'm sitting here listening to sappy music (Believe by Staind, don't get me wrong, great song, love the guitar work, but sappy) and wondering what will become of this situation. So I guess you could say, I started with certainty of the outcome, and now I'm typing and doubting everything about the situation. When, I guess according to Francis Bacon, if i would have just walked in with doubts, or an open mind, then i would have walked out with certainity, either "girlfriend" or "this wont work".
Touche Sir Bacon, Touche.
S.T.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
